


Secret

by rainbowrayndrops



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Asexual Character, DAN AND PHIL - Freeform, Flowers, Fluff, M/M, One Shot, Phan - Freeform, Waaaay too much flower symbolism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-18
Updated: 2018-02-18
Packaged: 2019-03-21 00:46:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13729551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbowrayndrops/pseuds/rainbowrayndrops
Summary: Gardenias symbolize purity and sweetness, as well as secret love.





	Secret

**Author's Note:**

> So I did this as a submission for the Phandom Games, which is why it's so short because the word limit was 1k. Wish I could've written more, though. The prompt was "Find the meaning of a flower, use the meaning of it to create a story." This is my first time posting on ao3 and it's also my first phanfic, so I'd appreciate feedback if you have any. Hope you enjoy it!

Gardenias symbolize purity and sweetness, as well as secret love

It would always have to be a secret. This thing between them. Even with all the speculation and theories, and how much everyone was convinced that they knew everything about them, people just wouldn’t get it. Plus it was none of their business anyway. That’s what Phil kept telling himself. That’s what Dan kept telling him.

It still hurt.

Phil still remembered the first time Dan had kissed him. Probably long after most had assumed it happened. There had been flirting long before, and they both knew how the other felt, but they were both too scared to do anything about it. And then… 2012. And Dan got so scared, and so defensive, so Phil took that to mean it was time for him to back off. He had resigned himself to the fact that Dan would be just his friend.

Then came 2013. It was a cold night in early January. Dan had been more distant than usual the past couple of days, so when Phil was lounging on the couch and Dan had come bursting through the door he knew something was different. He had went up to Phil and dropped a bouquet of white flowers on his lap, but it hadn’t taken Phil much to realize they were fake.

“I’m sorry they’re shitty. They’re supposed to be gardenias, apparently. Not the best imitation, but it’s hard to get real flowers in winter.”

“What are they for?”

“An apology.” Phil remembered there was a hesitation here, as if maybe Dan thought he could leave it at that, but nervously, he had continued. “I’ve never done anything like this before. And all that pressure from everyone.... I didn’t know what to do. So I hid, I pretended like there was nothing but there is and I’m a fucking idiot.”

“What are you on about?”

That’s when Dan had taken Phil’s face in his hands, brought him close and kissed him. The first of many to come. It was soft and sweet, but very quick, because Dan had almost immediately pulled away and started mumbling apologies, saying he should’ve asked first and he was so sorry, but one look at Phil made him realize he didn’t have to be.

“We should talk.” Phil had mumbled. And so they did.

They had laid out what they wanted from each other. But it wasn’t what most people thought it was. They never called it dating, even though they both kinda understood that’s what it was. But it was just...them. They held hands, and they kissed, and they cuddled, and that was it. Phil didn’t want anything else, and it was scary to talk about, but thankfully Dan was okay with it.

But no one would believe that. And look, maybe other couples had to deal with what people assumed went on behind closed doors. But other couples didn't have to deal with absolute strangers actually commenting on that, or possibly being enraged at the fact that they weren't fucking.

So that’s why they had also laid out their rules: Nothing in public, nothing online, no telling anyone that didn’t have their absolute trust.

But the thing is, Phil was starting to care less and less about what people thought. He was starting to think maybe all that would be worth it, if it meant that he wouldn't have to hide the truth anymore. So maybe that's why it hurt, because it wasn't only his decision to make.

“Phil?” Phil looked up. There was Dan, sitting across from him. Phil had been waiting for Dan to come back to their table with the coffee, but guessing from how comfortably seated he was, he had probably been back with it for a while. 

“Yeah?” Phil tried to hide the sadness on his face, but it was obvious Dan was already concerned. Dan nudged Phil’s coffee towards him, and Phil gratefully took a sip.

“What’s up?” Phil couldn’t meet Dan’s eyes, and started taking in his surroundings. They were in an outdoor seating area of a cafe, and there was decoratives tulips in a flower box near their table. Phil fixed his eyes on them, pointedly avoiding Dan’s gaze. “Phil?”

“You know our rules?” Phil asked nervously.

“Uh...the relationship rules?” Phil nodded. Dan seemed more than a little surprised about the topic. They didn’t really talk about it often, it was something they just followed without question. “What about them?”

“I’m tired of following them.”

“Oh.” Dan paused here, and Phil kept his eyes fixed on the tulips, too scared to read his expression. He immediately regretted bringing it up. He should’ve stayed quiet, things were fine the way they were, it was his fault for being so sensitive. Then he felt Dan’s hand tentatively placed on his own.

His first instinct was to pull away- no holding hands in public, that was one of their rules- but then he saw Dan’s small smile.

“Are you sure?” Phil asked, finally meeting Dan’s eyes.

“I was tired of following those rules anyway.” After a squeeze, Dan let go of Phil’s hand and looked around until his eyes landed on the tulips. He plucked a small red one, and placed it in Phil’s hand. “I love you, I don’t care who knows it.”

Phil smiled, and after some nervous hesitation leaned over and planted a kiss on Dan’s cheek. Then he pulled out his phone to take a picture of the flower. While he was positioning the camera, Dan reached over to hold his hand, the tulip clasped between them. Phil snapped the pic, and then worked on moving it to the folder of romantic photos that he kept secret.

“Do you want to post it?” Dan asked. 

“Oh,” Phil hadn’t realized he could do that now, but now that Dan had brought it up, he realized he wanted to. “Okay.”

Tulips signify fame, perfect love, and a declaration of love


End file.
